It’s our year to host Christmas for my husband’s family, and rather than exchanging gifts, we’ve decided to play a game with “white elephant” gifts and put our cash to better use.

In his letter to family, my husband wrote about a population he serves as principal in his rural Northwestern Wisconsin school district:

I thought about adopting a family for Christmas gifts, but the population I would like us to adopt is so transient that I’m not sure it would work. We have 43 homeless children in our district with two homeless shelters. The problem is that they move in and out all the time so I’m not sure they would still be there after we rounded up gifts. Instead, every day I see the need for winter clothes, so I think that would be the best way to give….. besides they don’t need toys – I do know they need to keep warm.

On a side note: Every year Darla and Craig adopt a boy/girl at a grade level they would like to buy a backpack and school supplies for. Last year, our school put together a total of 20 backpacks with school supplies. Teachers knew we had them and if a family shared their child would not have school supplies, they sent them to the office. All 20 were given away during our open house. If you are looking for a tax write-off – check with your local school district. Better yet just take a school supply list at a grade level and fill a backpack and donate it to your school.

Within a few days, his two sisters – owners of Guestbook Store and Font Diner – sponsored 12 students and delivered this beautiful pile of filled backpacks. They’d spent an afternoon shopping with our young niece and nephew, who loved the idea of helping needy children to get ready for school.

Ask and ye shall receive…

Former posts about backpack donation:
Donating School Supplies: It Feels Good
Positively Speaking: Lessons about Poverty

My mom introduced me to ZooToo, a free social networking site for animal lovers. She’s really passionate about it because ZooToo hosts contests where animal shelters can win makeovers. And one of our local Wisconsin animal shelters is in the top ten and could WIN a $25,000 makeover. Here’s the announcement from the Barron County ZooToo page:

Starting at noon on Monday, April 13th and running through Sunday, April 19th, you can vote 10 times a day. You MUST have a profile picture in order to vote!! We know we have YOUR vote, but will you help us spread the word?! The more people who log on and vote for HSBC, the better chance we have in winning AT LEAST $25,000. 70 clicks of a mouse (10 votes x 7 days) could gain us ONE MILLION DOLLARS. Please, help the animals of Barron County and spread the word to everyone you know to log onto ZooToo and vote!!!!

If you are an animal lover, I encourage you to support this excellent cause. It’s easy to vote if you’re a member.

1. Register for a free ZooToo membership, and validate your membership when the validation email comes through to your inbox.

2. Upload a profile photo - now you’re a full-fledged member.

3. Click on one of the top-10 animal shelters up to ten times per day for seven days – I’ll be giving all 70 votes to our local Humane Society of Barron County.

It’s like Facebook for lovers of dogs, cats, horses and turtles. If you’re an animal lover, I encourage you to check it out. And please consider voting for the Human Society of Barron County if you join!

This post was first published in March 2008.

On Easter Sunday, our family attended the church I belonged to for most of my youth. In the past few years, we’ve only gone to church a handful of times, unwilling to commit to a congregation during our family’s various moves. But on Easter, the tradition in the music is so moving, it envelopes me throughout the service — the familiarity of the songs I’ve sung for more than three decades.

I graduated with one of the musicians in this church, and in the past when I’ve come to listen to my mom sing in the choir, I’ve always been mesmerized by his inspirational trumpeting. This Sunday, as the congregation began to sing one of my traditional favorites — “Now All the Vault of Heaven Resounds” — it wasn’t our collective voice that inspired me. It wasn’t the power of the beautiful pipe organ. But rather, it was the majestic, yet humble and understated sound of his trumpet, barely audible during most of the hymn, but awesome in the few notes at the end of a verse. And by the final chorus, I was gripped by such overwhelming emotion that I had to stop singing, so my voice wouldn’t betray me and call attention to the tears streaming down my cheeks.

With my eyes, I searched for my musician friend throughout these songs, attempting to watch him work his inspirational magic over us. But, true to form, he remained hidden behind the choir, serving us only by sound. And when he stood up for communion, I noticed him and watched him set down his trumpet — and his handsome 12-year-old son did the same. You see, it’s no longer a single trumpet sounding. Now it’s two.

What a gift to stand beside your son and deliver the Holy Spirit to so many sinners like me.

And what a powerful way to pass the torch…

Dear 30-Year-Old Self,

Today we turn 40.

There are a lot of things I wish I could tell you.

For you, the next decade will be a roller-coaster ride, with exhilarating opportunity and success, coupled with stressful self-doubt and sadness.

I would encourage you to slow down, but that simply isn’t your personality right now. You’ll drive yourself at top speed, hitting the highway most of the time, but experiencing many dead ends and U-turns along the way.

Your core values will guide you, so you’ll never get too far off track.

I would tell you to reach out for help when you need it — but you probably won’t understand that’s what you need. Some of your friends may be less stressed than you are, because they choose to live in the same community as the rest of their family, or in a neighborhood, rather than in the country. Your friends depend on other people to help them raise their family. They understand that “it takes a village”. You’ll spend many years trying to do too much, too well, on your own.

But you’ll figure it out eventually.

I would tell you to be patient, but you will tell yourself that for ten years, and only be moderately successful at it. Instead I’ll tell you to keep the faith. The husband you chose is exactly the outstanding man you still want to spend the rest of your life with. And your children, who are little more than babies and mess-makers in your current life, will create the most fulfilling experience you’ve ever had.

You’ve invested your time wisely.

You think a perfectionist is someone with a neatly arranged home, who wears full makeup every day. But not all perfectionists identify with these traits. You’ll come to learn sometimes they have a messy house, but constantly expect more from themselves, no matter what’s happening in their life. They’re rarely completely satisfied with their achievements, and fail to celebrate their small successes.

Some day you’ll discover the happiness that can exist in lower expectations.

You’ll be surprised to discover your 30’s will take you in a wandering full-circle. So don’t burn your bridges.

Old connections will help you begin new journeys.

But the happy rights and regrettable wrongs of your 30’s will all mix to make you the imperfect – but improving – woman that writes this letter.

And I’m proud of that woman.

So forgive yourself more quickly than you think you should.

And smile more often.

And remember that process far outweighs product in every single breath you take.

Oh, and when you wonder about selling your tech stocks?

Just do it.

Love,
Your 40-Year-Old Self

Proud.

My Mom shares her birthday with President Lincoln – she’s always been proud of that, probably in the same way that I’m proud to have been born on Easter.

She’s proud, in general, I think, like the father and grandmother who raised her, and it’s shaped her life, I suppose.

She’s also independent. She even has a personalized plate that says, “MY WAY.”

For instance, my mom worked at Uniroyal for 25 years. She became an unwed mother in 1969 and fought successfully to keep her job during a decade when all pregnant women were expected to quit, giving up their income and seniority. Despite her independent spirit, smart management recognized my mom as the best, hardest worker they had. And although everyone else in the union worked from 8-4, my mom worked from 7-3 because it worked better for her, and management wanted what was better for their best employee.

I’m proud of that story.

Though Mom and I have experienced our share of catfights through the years, I don’t think it’s that unusual for a single mom raising her only daughter. And as time marches on, perspectives change, priorities switch, and emotions mellow. I’ve discovered that we were both born to be proud, independent, and sometimes inflexible Norwegians, but that we’ve relaxed a bit, now enjoying what is, rather than fuming about the way we want things to be.

Although I don’t believe I’m genetically predestined to acquire all my mom’s personality traits, we all know how it is with apples and trees;) And while I worried about this during the rollercoaster years, I celebrate it now.

I’m proud of how I’m like my mom.

Happy Birthday Mom!